Acceptance

I was optimistic going into social distancing, I still am. I know it’s necessary and I know we are going to have a ton of fun together as a family in the coming weeks.

But also, there are many things I am going to need to accept. That’s just the reality of it.

  1. My house still isn’t going to be clean. No matter how much I try, the fact of the matter is that I live with someone who just doesn’t care. I can take mini breaks from my work day to vacuum or scrub a counter, but it isn’t going to last. I am going to feel defeated constantly, I am going to cry about, and I will give up all together. This is where I was before all this and I need to accept that even though I’m home with potentially a bit more time for housework – It doesn’t even matter.
  2. This isn’t going to help me lose weight. It my perfect world (or some alternate version of a perfect world that includes social distancing) I would be eating these meal-planned options I laid out. So. Not. Happening. I’m eating junk, absolute garbage – it’s like I’ve discovered all this unhealthy food I didn’t even know we had and opting for it instead of my apples and chicken and eggs.
  3. There will be regression. It doesn’t matter how much I work with Lennon, it’s going to be nowhere near the 30 hours of therapy time a week he normally gets. I’m trying to dedicate 10 minutes every hour of my work day to his programs, knowing that it will never be enough. I need help and I just don’t have any. And even though I wish I was, I’m just not enough.